Ever get the feeling your significant other is from another planet? Here’s a noble New Year’s resolution: Instead of shaking your clenched fists at the sky and frustratedly cursing “Women!” (or “Men!” as the case may be), try putting some thought into where they’re coming from. You could do a lot worse than consulting the 3,000-year-old theories of astrology for a hint or two. Hey, you might even learn something about your own weird personality while you’re at it.
We don’t know how this stuff works, exactly; all we know is that even the briefest descriptions of the 12 zodiac signs align uncannily well with our own wives, mothers, selves, and other acquaintances. We also know both you and your old lady will look sharp (and celestially attuned) in one of these VFILES ‘Zodiac’ Sweatshirts (they’re even available in unisex sizing, so they’ll fit each of you to a T).
Step 1: Know your wife’s or girlfriend’s birthday. We can’t stress that enough. Step 2: Keep reading to see the 12 sweatshirts and learn a bit about each Zodiac sign, via short excerpts from The AstroTwins (astrologers to the stars, whom you can also book a reading with as part of our New Beginnings Pop-In Shop).